Monday, October 21, 2013

Why Malaysian Men Should Never (Ever!) Cheat

I think I know how you think you know it goes. You find a nice girl, you date, you might marry her and the next thing you know, you're falling in love with someone else. Or perhaps, infatuation would be a much more suitable word.




... This is a little off the topic but OMG you guys, this thing happened like a few months ago, but I couldn't talk about it until now! OMG! I only told Wewo and my mom in-law about it, and that was it! I had to forever hold my peace!

Ahem. Until now.

So anyway. Personally, I've been in relationships where I've had crushes on male and female celebrities, but I've never felt like I had to date two people at any given time so I'm not really sure whether it's a psychological thing or hormones that drives some people to cheat in their relationships. Do you think that some of us are born with a destructive trigger button within us that tends to go off whenever we feel empty in our lives?

Anyway. The point is, you should never (ever!) cheat! And here's my story.

So a couple of years back, like almost 5 years ago, I knew that I wanted to make the Very Serious Shift from being a professional mechanical engineer into a writer-cum-copywriter person. I had no idea at all how to do so, so I went for lots of meet-ups and meetings, gatherings and seminars to meet more people and get a rough idea on how to start a business, build side incomes, create tax accounts and all that.

I met W at one of these gatherings and we soon hit it off. He was a highly intelligent businessman and I felt like I had a lot to learn from him so we talked regularly and although I never actually understood what he did for a living, I can tell you that he was the CEO of an IT startup. We were kind-of interested in each other but W wanted to take things slow and I wanted to learn how to be a business person, so we were just platonic friends.

Then W flew off to America for a month and I got myself into a relationship while he was away. When he came back, he was all ready to woo me etc. but I was already with someone else so I ignored his calls and messages, despite the fact that he drove a whole hour to visit me at my house. I sound like a douche bag, right? But no, I wasn't. Because a woman's intuition is always right, and deep down, I knew that he just wasn't a good guy. Girls just know these things, whether or not they want to admit it to themselves.

One month later, W's best friend decides that it's his responsibility to tell me that W is getting married to someone else. I was like whoa, I dodged one bullet right there, because who marries someone in one month, right? Unless... he was woo-ing her at the same time he was pursuing me, too. Which isn't exactly any better.

But anyway. Facebook has definitely made it really hard for people to cheat on each other, because a few months later, I found out that W's wife was also expecting a baby. By then, I was already over the whole thing and had moved on with my life, happy as a bee because I started making money from writing!

And then a few months later, I started receiving phone messages from him again. Asking me out on dates.

Me: I thought you're married?
W: And?
Me: Isn't your wife pregnant?
W: So? :P

His replies made me soooooo speechless and angry that I actually screenshot the phone conversation and emailed it to him, threatening to send it to his wife if he didn't stop contacting me. His last reply was "Oh, so scary" but he stopped contacting me shortly. Hello, if I'm not willing to be your girlfriend, what makes you think that I'm willing to be the third party? *sweat*

Anyway, that happened 4-5 years ago and I never told his then pregnant wife anything because I didn't know her and it wasn't any of my business. It's not like he really cheated on her, right? At least, not with me, anyway. So I went on with my life and am now a full-time writer married to the most perfect husband in the world! Life is good.

That is... until the beginning of this year. I started working on this project with a lady client whom I thought was pretty friendly and nice. We met on the Internet as she posted writing jobs and I took up the project. After several months of a good work relationship, I decided to ask her about what her husband did for a living, and she replies with,

"You already know my husband!"

So then I clicked on her Facebook profile and really looked at her photos and her relationships and realised that W is her husband. Holy crap, we came full circle.

Shortly after, our relationship deteriorated because dear trusting wife that she is, she decided to get her husband to help her out with her business and there was NO WAY IN HELL that I was going to put myself in any relationship with a creepy man like that, money or no money.

Never cheat, because you will get caught in the end.

Can you imagine? Trying to cheat on your wife and not getting caught for almost 5 years and then... serendipity hits and suddenly your wife is working with your potential conquest.

Anyway, I can talk about it now because our working relationship is kind of over and I'm going to close the chapter (hopefully) permanently on all connections with that family. Whatever happens, I wish them the best of luck and hope that I never have to come across any more dramatic marital affair stories.

If I could choose life experiences, I would fill mine up with delicious food, delectable desserts and plenty of giggles with Wewo!

As for the Malaysian women out there who are in a relationship with men of questionable character...


If he's no good, then he's no good. No amount of stalking, worrying, cajoling and bribing will make him the perfect life partner for you. You're a grown woman and you are always in control of your life. So choose to be happy. 

And.... let's end this post with a cute photo of Tom Hiddleston, because Thomas can always make everything better!


Be good to each other and stay true! 



1 comment:

  1. If only some of my friend would live by the "being single is better than being lied to, cheated on and disrespected" motto. I totally agree with you babe. A leopard will never change its stripe. And yes I'm stalking your blog because I have just discovered that you actually write one!!

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